Ruskin Redux: Breaking a home show tradition

Time Tyler - TIMES files
Time Tyler
— image credit: TIMES files

I didn’t make it to the Ridge Meadows Home Show this year; as if to justify my decision, on the way home late Friday afternoon (4 p.m.), the first day of the home show, cars were in long lineups to turn left onto 105th Avenue and 240th Street.

Personally, this City is just too big to attend the home show, to park on the sports fields, to shuttle down to the ice rink in a golf cart driven by Ernie Daykin, and then to pay (it used to be free) to go in and walk around cheek-to-cheek with some of Maple Ridge’s 80,000 bodies; to look at hot tubs and patio furniture, cedar decking and water purifiers, politicians and chiropractors.

Prime territory, mind you, for pickpockets and perverts!

The best spot at the home show is upstairs at the bar, where they hide the psychics.

They will channel your dead grandfather, who will want to know why you aren’t watching the hockey. To which I reply that I’m not that interested in the hockey, save perhaps the Ovechkin/Crosby matchup.

He’ll want to know if the Maple Leafs are in it and I’ll scoff and tell him no, but they won the draft lottery.

I won’t even try to explain to him that there are teams from Florida and California and no teams from Canada.

It’s our game, he would say.

It’s anyone’s game I would reply.

I stayed home during the weekend, watching the Blue Jays.

That’s my home show, and there was ample parking.

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